Loved by Light (Wings, Wands and Soul Bonds Book 4) Read online

  That when I took her hands to comfort her, she was the one who comforted me. For a moment, I was the Ian before I died in the light world. Before everything exploded just behind my eyes.

  “Don’t,” Ultraviolet says, and this time, his voice is dead serious. “A soul bond is not for you, and you know the reason. Don’t let me down, or you won’t like the result.” Then he turns his back and disappears into the smoke, and everything around me slowly fades, leaving me alone in the hallway, panting.

  Tanner walks out of his apartment, looking around curiously before pinning his eyes on me. “Are you okay?”

  I nod. I have no idea where to go since Liz wants the apartment.

  “Walk with me,” Tanner says, striding up alongside me, wearing a black tee shirt, jeans, and sneakers.

  Sunlight streams through the doors when we push them open, and he leads me to a bench outside where we can watch the pond across from the apartment complex.

  “So things going okay with Liz?” His dark eyes probe me carefully.

  “Yes,” I say, aware he’s asking so much more than it appears on the surface.

  “Is she…?” He rubs his neck. “No. I mean. If I know what kind of fae she is, do you want to know?”

  I shrug. “Might help awaken her. Though, the knowledge should really be hers.”

  “Yeah, well, she might not know very soon,” he says. “Dark fae are kind of the opposite of light fae. Known for being hardheaded and sometimes missing something right in front of them, as I did with Eva and the fae who were after her.”

  I glance over at him. “You sense Liz is darkness?”

  He nods. “Kind of like Flynn could sense Avery was fire. There’s a connection. Not familial, but familiar.” He cocks his head as he looks at me. “What do you feel about her?”

  “Nothing,” I say, though it’s a lie. But the truth doesn’t matter. Not now that the world is upside down. “So you think she’ll be harder to awaken? And what do you mean with you and Eva?”

  “I didn’t see the chaos fae hiding next to me with suppressors. I didn’t see the truth in the letters that were sent to me.” He sighs. “Dark fae tend to be straightforward and honest. We’re soldiers who fight on the front lines. We don’t have time for nuance. We think everyone is just as honest as we are and don’t have a lot of time to analyze motives.”

  “So?”

  “So I doubt it will be easy to awaken Liz,” Tanner says. “I don’t think it hurts for you to tell her or to try and help her along.”

  “Shouldn’t you, then?” I ask.

  “No,” he says, shaking his head. “I think she trusts you. And she should. You’re a good fae, Ian. A good man too. We all see it. Maybe she can help you see that again.”

  I look down at my hands. “It’s not that I doubt my own goodness. It’s just that I doubt… my purpose.”

  “Well, don’t,” Tanner says, giving my shoulder a shove with his. His grin widens. “You know, light and darkness… it’s a good combo, as we proved when we were partners.”

  I nod. “This is different.”

  “So you don’t feel anything? No resonance? I thought you were excited to meet a beacon you might bond with.”

  “Things changed,” Ian says. “I’m not myself.”

  “We’ve all noticed.”

  “Then you should get why I might not feel resonance with her,” I say softly, leaving the rest unspoken.

  I might not feel a bond because I don’t want to feel a bond.

  I might be blocking it.

  I don’t know, but whatever it is, it’s best for everyone if I keep doing it.

  “So should we find another prince to help her? Since I can’t be her soul bond?” I ask.

  “You don’t have to be her soul bond to help her,” Tanner says with a snort. “You have such a pure heart, Ian. I’m sure even a friendship bond with her would be enough to awaken her. You shine a light on things. Bring out the truth.”

  “Even though I couldn’t see the truth when it was right in front of me,” I say bitterly.

  “Hey, you gotta buck up,” he says. “You’ve seen the truth now. Be the fae you wanted all light fae to be. Light up the world.”

  Oh, I will. But not the way he’s thinking.

  “I’ll be her friend,” I say quietly. “Have you met her? How could anyone not be her friend? But as for the rest…”

  Tanner stands, putting a hand on my shoulder to pat it gently. “Don’t worry about the rest. Trust me on that. It never goes well.”

  “I do like having her around,” I say, standing and stretching in the sunlight. The difference between being with her or Ultraviolet is the difference between day and night. “She brings peace to me. And while I can, I’ll protect her.”

  “Good man,” Tanner says, standing with me. “Now I’m off to find my soul bond for some lunch. You want to come?”

  I shake my head. “I’m going to go check on Liz, see how she’s doing with the new info.”

  “All right,” Tanner says, rubbing his neck as he leads the way back to the building. “But you know, given how quickly you want to go back to her…”

  “Stop it,” I say, waving away his insinuations with a hand.

  We part at the top of the stairs as he goes into his apartment, probably to be greeted by his loving soul bond.

  He deserves it, as a dark fae who fought his whole life to protect kingdoms like mine for very little benefit.

  All of my friends deserve happiness, and though I ache for it, I’m not sure I’m the same.

  When I get to my door, I see a note taped to it. I narrow my eyes as I pull it off, bringing it up to my face to read the delicate script.

  I went for a drive. Sorry, I needed fresh air. I’ll be back soon.

  ~Liz

  At the bottom is her number, and I sigh as I open my apartment and go inside, kicking the door shut after.

  I sit on the couch for a moment, turning her note over in my hands. I close my eyes, trying to sense her stream.

  A drive, huh? I think of that rickety, rusty old death trap and wince at the thought of her being in it.

  What if she crashes? Are there even those inflatable bags humans use to cushion their bodies when they crash into one another?

  Flynn likes to watch violent action movies, so I’ve seen what cars do when things go wrong.

  The thought of Liz in one haunts me.

  I want to fly to her now, at the speed of light. But I can’t bring her back with me that way.

  I bite my lip as I think of a solution. I don’t know how long I’ll be in this world, able to protect Liz. But there’s one way to protect her even after I’m gone. And it just happens to be a way I can also go find her if she needs me.

  And it’ll keep her from taking that death trap around.

  I stand, texting Chadwick to make a deposit in my account.

  I have some shopping to do.

  7

  Liz

  So that was a mistake.

  Not going for a drive. That part was fine.

  But going out in this car, which has never been very reliable. Yeah, that wasn’t very smart of me.

  I let out a sigh as I dial Ian’s number and hit send, wondering how I can possibly ask for more help after everything he has done for me.

  I still don’t know if he’ll be mad I left.

  But I mean, he doesn’t run my life. He helped me, and he might be the one who will help me turn into a fairy, but I still have my freedom.

  I think.

  The phone rings only once before he picks up. “Hello?”

  Geez, even the sound of his deep voice just melts me.

  His fae form was so gorgeous I thought I was just going to melt in his presence.

  “Liz?” His voice turns concerned. “Are you there? Are you okay?”

  “Uh, yes,” I say quickly. “Sorry.” Wind blows by the lonely rest stop, where there’s only a bathroom I would never trust, some ragged grass, and a few benches. “My
car broke down.”

  I hear a snort as if he’s trying to suppress laughter.

  “Figures,” he says.

  “Hey.” I sigh. “Can you come get me?”

  “Give me the address,” he says.

  “Can’t you like stalk or track me or something?”

  “An address would be easier at this point. You and I aren’t bonded enough to—”

  “Ian?” I ask because he cut out suddenly. I look down and realize my phone is dead.

  Just peachy.

  I walk over to one of the benches, fiddling with my phone, hitting the power button to see if it will come back on.

  I know my battery was charged. I know it was.

  The wind blows by, and I wonder if Ian really will be able to find me. If not, I’ll have to go to the road and wave someone down. Hitchhike maybe, or—

  An engine rumbles behind me, and I turn to see an old Cadillac pulling into the rest stop.

  I watch it as it parks in front of one of the bathrooms, and three men pile out of it, heading inside, laughing raucously.

  I keep my eyes pointed carefully ahead on the grass in the dead lot ahead of me.

  I did want time to think, after all. I should just keep thinking while I try to figure out how to help Ian find me.

  How could my phone just die like that?

  Right after my car died too. It’s like everything is just determined to die on me.

  A few minutes pass, and I let out a sigh of relief as I realize that the guys in the bathroom aren’t here to mess with me, even if they are in the bathroom longer than most people would be.

  I’m a fairy, I think to myself. Maybe if I access my powers…

  But no, there’s only darkness when I try to think about it. A sleepy, heavy feeling like I’m about to pass out.

  I hit the power button on my phone again, then sigh, wondering if I should just take a chance and ask the guys when they come out of the restroom if I can borrow a phone.

  The alternative is clearly dying here, alone, at a rest stop.

  Or hitchhiking, which is even less safe.

  And I don’t have the best luck with strangers.

  My heart starts to beat faster, and I think of Ian’s face, worried about me, unsure where I am.

  I don’t want to make him worried. I stand and walk in the direction of the restroom, but I’ve barely taken a step when the sound of male laughter rings out and the men appear, walking toward their car.

  I take a step toward them, then hesitate when I see one of them is smoking and all of them are covered in tattoos.

  One of them flicks his cigarette into the grass, stomping it with a foot, and turns to glare at me. He stops, and his companions almost bump into his back, making him frown at them.

  Then he turns his gaze back to me. “What are you looking at?” He sneers at me. His hair is shorn short, and his dark eyes contrast with his pale skin.

  I glance at his cigarette, wanting to call him out for littering but deciding now probably isn’t the time. “Can I borrow your phone? Mine died.”

  He narrows his eyes as he and his friends come closer, and I take a step back. “If you want to borrow my phone, why are you backing up?”

  “Yeah, you don’t trust us?” his friend asks from behind him with a snicker.

  The one in front looks to the road as if to see if anyone is watching, then turns back to me. “I have a phone you can borrow. Why don’t you use your car charger, though?”

  I frown, wondering if I should even tell them my car is dead too.

  But as his lips turn up in a grin, I think he just guessed.

  “A damsel in distress, huh?” He looks to his friends. “Sure, we can help you out.”

  I bite my lower lip, thinking it’s probably too late not to trust them. I do know some self-defense. But maybe I’m just thinking the worst of people.

  Ignoring a prickle of fear inside me, I take a step closer. Then another.

  The one in front adjusts his leather jacket, snickering at his friends. “Come on. Come closer.”

  “You know what? I think I’m just fine,” I say, wishing I’d never left Ian’s apartment at all.

  Wishing I hadn’t been homeless just because of a couple pervs and an incompetent payroll company.

  Wishing I had a family and friends or a normal life.

  The men all start to walk forward.

  “Hey,” the leader says. “Where are you going?”

  I turn and start to run, but his friends catch up quickly, blocking my way and forcing me to turn around and face them.

  I feel a little like a sheep surrounded by wolves.

  “Stop it,” I say. “I don’t want any trouble.”

  “I want some trouble,” the leader says, coming closer.

  His eyes leer down at me, and he slowly moves them up and down my body, making me feel slightly sick.

  Stay focused, I tell myself. It won’t help if you faint. Then Ian will never find you.

  He doesn’t have the address, I realize. He isn’t going to find me anyway.

  The man in front of me reaches for the hem of my shirt, and I kick out at him. He catches my foot, and I let out a cry as the others come in close, grabbing at me and managing to haul me into the air so they can carry me toward their car.

  “Come on. Let’s get her inside. We can’t have anyone seeing this.”

  One of them opens the door while I kick at him with the leg he let go of. But despite my kicks and yells, they easily shove me into the back seat, and the leader gets in with me.

  “I’m not going to hurt you,” he says. “I just want to have some fun. You understand, right? And hey, we’ll let you use our phone, maybe even give you a ride someplace…”

  I bring my knee up into his balls.

  “Bitch!” He hisses, curling up as I make my way backward, scrabbling for the door. I grab the handle before the others can stop me and open it, kicking against the man in front of me so I can push myself out of the car.

  I fall out, hitting pavement.

  But just as I’m about to run, the other men catch up, having rounded the car to cut me off.

  I feel like a dog herded by lions.

  I stand there, chest heaving, as the man in the back seat limps out to face me. His friend grabs my arms, pulling them behind me, keeping me from running as I’m forced to face the man who just attacked me.

  “You’re going to pay for that, bitch. You…” The leader trails off at the sound of an engine, and we all turn to see a car pulling into the parking lot.

  And not just any car.

  A Rolls.

  A freaking Rolls Royce in shining silver.

  “Holy shit,” one of them says. “Let’s get out of here.”

  They try to pull me toward their car again, but I fight with everything I’ve got, trying to turn back and see the Rolls, trying to signal to whatever crazy rich person is driving it that I need help.

  Never had much luck with rich people being nice, but I have to hope.

  But I’m just not strong enough, and they’re managing to shove me into the back seat again, pushing my head and—

  “Ouch!” I fall onto the seat, suddenly released as the man holding me jerks back.

  “Bastard!” someone says as I hear punches and scuffling break out.

  I’m still dazed, trying to right myself, but when I turn over to look up and see what’s happening, I’m shocked to find Ian there.

  Or maybe not since it just seems fated that he shows up for me whenever I need him.

  He looks furious, his thick white-blond hair waving in the wind as he stands over two of his felled opponents, balling his fists as he faces the third one. “Is there no limit to your evil? To your depravity? How many of your kind simply want to kidnap and rape?”

  I can see his shoulders shaking, feel the visceral rage and disappointment in his voice.

  He’s not just angry, he’s upset.

  For me.

  Or because of me.


  I put a hand to my head, wishing I hadn’t caused him so much trouble. But regardless, I know that now that he’s here, I’m safe.

  He glances over at me just to check on me, and when he sees how dazed I am, angry color reddens his cheeks and his eyes go angry storm cloud gray as he turns back to his prey.

  He grabs the man by his shirt, jerking him up to face him. “I don’t even—I can’t…” Ian looks at a loss for words. He lowers his head for a moment, then raises it and head-butts the guy hard right in his nose, which makes a crunching sound as the guy lets out a howl.

  Ian drops him to the ground, then kicks him in the chest, sending him rolling over the pavement, where he lies still, groaning.

  But Ian doesn’t appear to be done. My gentle angel’s fists are clenched, and he’s radiating anger as he strides toward the man on the ground.

  He kicks the man again, sending him rolling.

  I don’t think he’s going to stop. Maybe ever.

  I push myself up and jump out of the car, adrenaline making it possible to move again, something calling me to go to Ian. To help him.

  He draws a fist back and is about to kneel and strike the guy when my arms come around his waist, and I jerk back, trying to pull on him.

  “Stop it,” I say. “Stop. Just stop. He’s not moving anymore.”

  The wind whistles by us as Ian looks down at the man on the ground who is just lying there, still groaning.

  “He’s evil,” Ian says. “I’m tired of this world. Every time I turn my back… It’s just like my world, only I… I…” He trails off and sinks back against me, relaxing into my hold as I refuse to let go.

  He turns in my arms, gently pulling my hands away so he can study me. “Are you okay?”

  “How did you find me?” I ask. “My phone died. I couldn’t—”

  “I tracked you,” he says flatly, rubbing the back of his neck after releasing my arms. “I suppose we do have a bond after all.”

  “Friends if nothing else, right?”

  “Right.”

  But as we stare at each other, the silence and sunlight punctuated only by the groans of his victims, I can tell friendship doesn’t really describe this.

  It’s something more like fate pulling us together and an attraction that lights me up even now when we should be focused on anything else.