Felix Read online

  “Oh God,” she said, as he lifted her up and wrapped her legs around his waist, pressing her into the wall again and kissing her as if he’d die if he stopped.

  He loved the way her tongue pressed against his, the way her hips ground into him, seeking pleasure that only he could give.

  He held her up with one hand and moved the other to her zipper, sliding it down, unable to resist stroking the wetness inside.

  He’d been longing to touch her for so long.

  He stroked over her damp curls, loving the way her muscles jumped as he explored her sensitive folds, then found his way to her clit.

  She bit back a scream as he pressed down on it, then worked in a slow circle, feeling her nails dig into his back, signaling her need.

  He kept her pinned to the wall, moaning and struggling against his finger as he brought her higher and higher in the cloud of tension that was making it hard to breathe.

  God, he could almost taste her. For now, his finger would have to be enough, though he wanted his tongue inside her, his cock, every part of him.

  Wanted to lick her and own her and do all the thousands of things to give her pleasure that he dreamed of for so long.

  She was his secret. The heart that everyone said he was lacking.

  And now she was here and he was lost to anything but the feel of her heart beating against his chest, her clit under his hand, her mouth urging him on against his ear.

  When she came, he was almost sorry for it because it was too soon, because he felt it would ruin the illusion.

  Surely, she would disappear before she let him see that most-wanted sight.

  But she didn’t, and Felix pulled back and stared in sheer wonder as he gave her room to arch back, overwhelmed by pleasure, both hands in her hair as her eyes went to the heavens. Her eyes closed to the rain, and she jerked as release went through her.

  She was so beautiful, murmuring his name as the rain fell over them, making her glow in the overhead street lights.

  A fantasy. A vision.

  Everything he could ever want.

  And then she leaned forward, breathing heavily, staring up at him, and he removed his hand and put it around her waist again, marveling at how real it all felt.

  She struggled to get down, and he slowly lowered her so they were standing chest to chest once again, his hands grieving the loss of her weight.

  Her hand curved up around his neck, pulling him forward, and suddenly, he felt the sharp tip of a knife against his side again.

  “I don’t know why you think I’m an illusion. But I do know that by the time I’m through with you, you’ll wish I was one.”

  Felix blinked, feeling like the world had turned into a whirlpool swirling around him as he tried to understand her words.

  The drunkenness was fading, and he was realizing that she might actually, truly be there. No matter how impossible it seemed. “Diana?”

  She moved so her lips were against his ear, tantalizing him. “In the flesh.”

  * * *

  “Hey, what’s going on over there?”

  Both Felix and Diana looked up as Max came around the corner, the burly lion shifter looking grumpy as usual as he stared them down.

  Even in the rain, his hulking figure was easily recognizable.

  “You okay, Fifi?” Max folded his arms, looking impatient.

  I have a knife in my side but, yes, otherwise, just fine.

  “I’m good,” Felix yelled. “Go back inside.”

  Against him, Diana was frozen, looking like she wasn’t sure whether she should run.

  With adrenaline sharpening his senses and the alcohol in him fading, Felix wondered how he could have ever mistaken her for anything but real.

  Perhaps because on bad nights, he could swear he saw her across a crowded room or a dark street, watching him like nothing was odd about it.

  Perhaps because she was supposed to be dead.

  Felix stroked back her hair, not caring about the knife pressing into his side or the fact that Max was watching.

  “Tell your friend to get back,” she warned softly, her voice still husky from the pleasure of a few moments before. “This doesn’t have to involve him.”

  Felix pulled her in against him, ignoring her gasp as her knife sank into his side slightly, causing blood to bloom over his shirt.

  “I missed you,” he said softly. The feel of her, the scent, was more important to him than the knife at his side could ever be.

  Her eyes flashed, dark diamonds lit by sparks. “I didn’t miss you.”

  “Liar,” he said, dipping down so their lips were a hair’s breadth apart. He could feel her bottom lip tremble, but she didn’t pull away.

  The rain bounced off her skin, making it clear just how real she was, and Felix found it hard to even catch his breath at the realization that she was truly alive.

  It turned his entire world upside down and backward. Like gravity didn’t exist.

  “Separate, you two,” Max called out, and Felix let out a sigh, knowing the moment he gave Diana her freedom, she would run.

  Good thing with his sleep powers, he could hopefully stop her. She was an alpha wolf, but—

  He felt the knife leave his side as Diana took in a shaky breath and then pushed violently at his shoulders, shoving him away from her.

  She darted out of his grasp. Felix was about to reach for her, but she was just gone.

  He had no idea what direction to aim in because she was nowhere and everywhere at once.

  He could still scent her, hear footsteps somewhere, but with the pounding rain, it was impossible to locate where she was.

  Was this all a dream after all?

  He heard heavy footsteps as Max caught up to him, putting a hand on his shoulder. “You all right?”

  Felix moved his hand down to where her knife had been and then brought it up so he could see bright-red blood streaming off his fingers in the rain, and he sighed in relief.

  Max tapped a foot on the pavement. “You’re the only person I know who could look happy about being stabbed.” He jogged to the edge of the building and looked around it, then shook his head. “I have no idea where she went to. She just… disappeared. I should have gotten involved sooner.”

  Felix strode to Max and grabbed the other man by his jacket, jerking him forward so he could glare into his face. Felix was one of the only men tall enough to look Max right in the eyes, and right now, he wanted to take advantage of that.

  “You shouldn’t have interfered at all,” he spat angrily. “You scared her.” He released Max with a shove, still fuming at having lost his chance to question Diana.

  “She stabbed you,” Max retorted, folding his arms stubbornly over his chest. “I think she was trying to kill you.”

  Felix snorted. “I don’t care. I needed to talk to her, and you ruined that. Thanks a lot.”

  Max cocked his head, and rain ran down the lines of his cheeks. “Why was she trying to kill you?”

  Felix shrugged. “Many shifters want to kill me for many different reasons. Revenge. Misguided rage at me for being the lackey of the Tribunal. Justified rage at me for being the lackey of the Tribunal. Take your pick.”

  Max scented the air, and his golden eyes glittered. “You were having sex with the woman who wanted to kill you?”

  Felix leaned on the wall with his hands in his pockets, letting out a sigh. “Some of us like to spice things up a little more than usual.”

  Max shook his head. “You’re so weird. Then again, I already knew that.”

  Felix took a deep breath and closed his eyes, remembering everything that had happened from the moment he’d seen her on the dance floor.

  “You saw her, didn’t you?” Felix looked at Max warily, knowing he was probably giving away too much. Still, he had to know.

  “Yes,” Max said. “And I also saw her vanish into thin air. What kind of shifter is she?”

  “Wolf,” Felix said, narrowing his eyes. “I’m not sure how s
he did that. Could be her alpha power.”

  “You don’t know?”

  Felix shook his head. “Most of us don’t tell our powers to anyone but our mate. It’s a trust thing.”

  “And she isn’t your mate.”

  “No.” But she could have been.

  “Well, I’m going back inside, then… if you’re sure you’re all right.” It was Max’s duty as head bouncer to patrol the club.

  “I’m sure,” Felix said quickly, staring up at the storm clouds, not caring that he got rain in his eyes. “I’ll stay out here for a minute. Cool off.”

  Max nodded and disappeared through a side door.

  Felix wanted to see if Diana would come back.

  Seeing her again would prove all of this hadn’t been an illusion. His whole body ached to pick up where they’d left off.

  “Come kill me,” he murmured, but only the rain answered, making him colder as the minutes ticked on. “Do whatever you want. Just come back.”

  Chapter 4

  “You’re back sooner than I expected.” Seth had a knife in his hand and was eyeing it as he looked up at Diana. He was propped on a stool at the bar as she walked into the compound.

  She’d gotten used to this place, with its hard, cold exterior and stainless-steel surfaces, so different from the rustic cabins in which she’d been raised.

  But she’d never gotten used to the way Seth or the others looked at her, as if she could never be trusted no matter what she did, just because of what she was.

  The only one who truly trusted her was their boss, Byron, and he wouldn’t be happy with how things had gone tonight.

  She plopped down on a stool next to him and put her head in her hands, trying to wipe away some of the rain and tension. She could still feel the knife in her pocket, wet with Felix’s blood.

  She’d stayed in the rain long enough to hopefully wash away Felix’s scent, the proof of what they’d done.

  She’d gone to kill him and ended up making love to him.

  The other wolves would kill her if they knew.

  Everyone at the compound was united in one purpose. Killing anyone associated with the Tribunal, especially the man Diana used to love.

  “It was a fast mission,” she said sharply. “You knew I wasn’t going to get it done in one night. I just did some reconnaissance; that’s all.”

  Seth snorted. “The boss won’t like it. I think he hoped you could get it done tonight, with your… abilities.”

  She shrugged a shoulder, hoping to appear at ease. In truth, everything was roiling inside her. She’d never expected to be affected by Felix like that.

  If they hadn’t been interrupted, she didn’t know if she would have stabbed him or fallen back into his arms.

  “You know, we make a lot of exceptions for you,” Seth said. “A lot of guys here think you should just be mated, given you’re a female alpha, but we let you do missions because of your… uniqueness.”

  She scoffed, reaching over the bar for a beer, which she opened on the edge of the counter before taking a swig. The cool liquid refreshed her, and she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand… which only made her remember Felix’s kiss.

  “My uniqueness is exactly why no one should mate me,” she said coldly. “You’ve seen what I am.”

  “Yeah, but…” Seth put a hand out, hoping to cover hers, though she let out a hiss and pulled back. She wasn’t ready to be touched again. And definitely not by him.

  “Try that again, and I’ll gut you.” She glared at him, sipping her beer.

  Seth sighed. “You can’t stay unmated forever. No matter what… flaws you may have, you would still grant one of us power. Prestige. Just mating an alpha female…”

  She bit back a snarl at his words, hating that her purpose in this world had always just been about what advantages she could grant to the men around her.

  Felix had been the only one to stand up for her, to not push her in that way, but then he’d hurt her worse than all of them.

  “I’m here to help you kill members of the Tribunal. Nothing else.”

  Seth sighed as he pushed himself off the stool, taking his knife with him. “The boss will want to see you. Get a full report of what happened. He won’t be happy if you didn’t even make an attempt.”

  Diana pulled out the knife, showing it to Seth, letting the blade catch the light, glinting with red. “Will that make him happy?”

  “Not unless you can promise you’ll give him the head of the Tribunal’s top assassin on a plate a few days from now.”

  She scoffed. “If anyone else feels more able to take on Darkness, they are free to try.”

  She smirked inwardly as Seth’s face went pale. Everyone knew Felix’s reputation, and no one but her had volunteered to face him.

  He’d been known as an unstoppable monster even years ago, and his reputation had only grown since.

  His fluffy name belied a cold, fierce personality that would stop at nothing to do the Tribunal’s will.

  She’d learned that the hard way.

  “What happened between the two of you?” Seth asked, narrowing his eyes on her. “You get an odd look in your eye whenever we speak of him. And you claim to be the only one who could take him on, but you come back with only a little blood. You don’t want anyone else to take him out, insisting you can do it. If I didn’t know better, I’d say there was history there.”

  She frowned, pressing her lips into a firm line. “We all have history with the Tribunal. With Felix in particular. It should come as no surprise that I have history too.”

  Seth stepped closer, leaning uncomfortably over her and caging her against the counter as he let out a low snarl. “You’d better not have been with him. Not when you turn all of us down. If you have that kind of history, then it might be best if I go to the boss about—”

  She whirled on him, grabbing him by the collar and lifting him off his heels as she held the knife, still wet with Felix’s blood, to Seth’s throat. “Threaten me again, and you won’t have a tongue to squeal with.”

  Seth squirmed out of her grasp, but not before she saw the fear in his dull blue eyes.

  Good.

  She needed more time to deal with the Felix situation. Time to sort out her feelings without the boss intruding.

  So she could kill him next time without hesitating.

  She pointed her knife at Seth, making him flinch, and then laughed, heading in the direction of the boss’ office to give her mission report.

  * * *

  Felix stayed in the rain for hours, waiting for Diana to show up, before Benny came out and dragged him bodily in out of the rain and threw a blanket around him.

  Felix was fully sober now, which meant he could feel the full pain of having Diana back for a moment before losing her again, not knowing if she would come back.

  As he sat in a chair, shuddering in his blanket, he heard his co-workers talking around him, worried about him, asking him questions, but all he could do was sit and shake.

  How could he explain any of this to them? It was so long before they came into his life. He’d been a different person with Diana. Not the glib, sarcastic shell he’d become.

  Back when he could connect with people, rather than just tease them.

  His sister, Tasha, seemed especially worried, and she gently rubbed his shoulder with one hand as the world still seemed to spin.

  Slowly, some of them settled into chairs around him, all of them probably waiting for him to talk.

  Felix glanced up at Lock, whom he’d known the longest, at least as an adult. They’d met at an alpha challenge when Felix was still working for the Tribunal and had saved each other’s lives a couple times since.

  Lock had mated Felix’s sister, Tasha, whom Felix had only known as a toddler because he’d given his life to the Tribunal so she could go free.

  Felix rubbed a hand through his hair, hating how even that tied back to Diana.

  Being torn away from her.

 
; “Come on,” Benny said, slumping in a chair across from Felix. “Tell us what happened. We won’t judge.”

  “Yeah,” Lock said. “It’s a little weird to see you shell-shocked. We just want to know you’re all right.”

  “She didn’t actually stab you that hard, right?” Tasha asked, reaching for his jacket.

  Felix shrugged her off, then sighed and opened it for his friends to see. When several gasped at the dried blood, he lifted his shirt to show his perfectly healed skin. “It wasn’t even painful. She could have made it hurt more if she wanted to.”

  “She was obviously conflicted,” Lock said, a small twinkle in his eye as he looked over at Felix. “Max told us what you’d been doing before.”

  Felix shot Max a glare, but he just shrugged.

  “They would have smelled it on you anyway,” Max said.

  Felix sighed. “Well, anyway, it was nice of you all to think of me, but I’m fine.” He stood, keeping the blanket around him. He’d always been the one to get other people’s secrets, but he didn’t intend to share any of his. “I’m going to head up to bed.”

  He’d been renting an apartment over the bar in return for keeping an eye on it. On nights like this, it made it easy to get quickly home.

  “Wait,” Lock said. “Don’t you want to talk about it? You look absolutely wrecked.”

  Felix shook his head. “I don’t think so. Not tonight.” Or ever. He turned his back on them and walked out of the room and down a hallway that led to a staircase that would take him upstairs.

  When he was about to open the door to the staircase, he felt Benny catch him by the back of his arm.

  Felix whirled around, pinning him with fierce eyes. “What?”

  Benny paused, hesitating for just a moment, worry in his hazel eyes. “Look, you helped me. A lot. With Harley. I don’t like seeing you trying to handle this alone now.”

  “Handle what?” Felix raised an imperious eyebrow.

  “A woman you clearly long for coming to fuck you up.”

  Felix snorted. “She could hardly have fucked me up. Though, you’re right. I long to fuck her.”

  Benny blocked his way before he could go past. “It’s more than that. I know the expression in your eyes. It’s pain, wanting something you can’t have. Hell, it might be even worse than mine was.”